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***10/9/2013: I have been completely overwhelmed by the number of visitors this post has received in the past few days (over 130,000 at last count!). I am not sure who first shared it — or who continues to share it — but I want to THANK YOU all for visiting, reading, and sharing it. I think the realities of breast cancer are so often trivialized and “pinkified” so I am sincerely grateful to everyone who has taken the time to read or share my blog. I am sorry to say that my story is just one of many, but with your help, we may just be able to do something to change that. Please feel free to leave me a comment or to share your own story below — or send an email: cancerinmythirties@yahoo.com. Thank you all. ***
Peter Griffin / Family Guy “What Grinds My Gears” Episode
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I am not a ranter by any means and I have been pretty quiet about “Pinktober” and what has come to be known as “Pinkwashing” in breast cancer circles, but seeing October 13th advertised as “National No Bra Day” and as a “fun” way to support people with breast cancer has pushed me over the edge.
Are you kidding me? How on earth could a day where girls and women are encouraged to post and share photos of their braless breasts and to walk around with their nipples poking through their shirts be “supportive” for women who are living with or who have died from breast cancer, or who have managed to ‘complete’ the arduous treatments and disfiguring surgeries required to put them into remission?
I think the answer is simple. It is not.
Like so many women–and men–who have faced this disease, I have lost my breasts to cancer. Though I had a terrific surgeon, it was a physically and emotionally disfiguring surgery.
The cancer had gone so deep and was so extensive on my left side that it was at first inoperable. Even after months of chemo, my surgeon took as much tissue and skin as possible and went deep into my axilla (underarm area). The cancer had metastasized to my lymph nodes and had invaded them to such a degree that they broke open to allow the cancer cells to go beyond the walls of the nodes. Because of how invasive the surgery was and of how much nerve damage, etc. resulted, it was not only extremely painful then, but continues to be a source of pain and phantom sensations that affect my entire upper torso even today.
I required over a year of physical therapy just to be able to raise my arms again and I still don’t have full function or range of motion. And, because of pain, swelling, conspicuous compression sleeves and gloves, I am constantly reminded of the lymphedema that resulted from the surgery and loss of my lymph nodes. Oh, and the life-threatening infections that forced a couple of hospitalizations and four months of massive doses of antibiotics this summer (almost 2 years after my original surgery), are also a little reminder of some of the things that the bilateral mastectomy and lymph node surgeries have left me with. And there is so much more…
So the thought of seeing bra-less women flaunting two body parts that I have lost to cancer — more than I already see this on a regular day — does not feel all that supportive. In fact, it feels quite the opposite.
I think of myself as an open-minded person. I do my best not to judge others or their beliefs and ideals. I have a pretty good sense of humor and am usually the first to poke fun at myself. And I make light of breast cancer and my struggles, treatments and their side effects, lack of breasts, fear of death, etc. fairly frequently. It is how I cope. But, given what I have been through, I think I have earned the right to joke and make light of how this terrible disease has affected me. But if you haven’t been there or taken care of someone who has been there, then you should think twice before you publicize a day that jokes about putting the first body parts we usually lose to this disease “out there” on display even more conspicuously and then labeling it as an activity that helps our ’cause’.
We live in a society that makes a huge hoopla about breast cancer while at the very same time trivializing the seriousness of the disease. How can we be so contradictory?
While I am beyond thrilled that breast cancer is no longer a taboo issue and that people are talking about it, the commercialism has gotten out of hand. There is nothing pink and rosy about breast cancer, yet it has been pink-washed to death. It is a serious disease that kills.
And while I do think we need more awareness and education (about metastatic disease, about how young women CAN develop breast cancer, about how women (young and not so young) DO die from this disease, about the importance of research, etc.), I don’t think we need the kind of awareness that buying a jar of salsa with a pink ribbon on it brings. While I hardly ever see “awareness” products addressing the topics above, I can’t go anywhere without seeing pink products. Heck, I just have to look out of my front window to see giant pink garbage totes. 
The stores are filled with pink as companies try to make a buck off breast cancer. If you look carefully at these products, you’ll find that some of them don’t even donate a cent to breast cancer awareness, support, research, etc. And oftentimes those that do make a very minimal donation — and not always to organizations/programs where the money is well spent. Case in point — during a recent trip to my grocery store’s pink breast cancer section, I found (after reading the small print) that the maximum per item donation to the breast cancer “cause” was $0.35. An abysmal $0.35 for a $25.00 plastic coffee mug! And, guess what, once that $0.35 reaches “the cause,” a portion of it is lost to overhead, salaries and advertising costs.
One of the most unfortunate issues here is that well-meaning people are willing to buy pink products, even pay a little extra, because they think they are helping to do something to “cure” breast cancer or to provide “hope” to breast cancer patients. Why is this sad? Because those dollars spent on pink key chains, pink beer koozies, pink boxes of crackers and pink plastic water bottles could be going to fund research into metastatic disease, better (and less harmful) treatments, the elusive “cure” and, dare I say it, PREVENTION.
My intention is not to offend or to hurt the feelings of anyone who is genuinely trying to help, but I think it is important for you to know the truth. So please put your bra back on, put down those pink garbage bags (unless you really like pink that much!), that pink “awareness” pepper spray keychain, and that pink breast cancer “awareness” vibrator and dildo (yes, I’m blushing and yes, these are real things that their merchandisers say will “help you raise breast cancer awareness” — though they are shipped discretely in plain, unmarked boxes so no one knows what you purchased) and send a few dollars to an organization that devotes their fundraising dollars to research. You just have to do a bit of homework or read the labels on those pink items to see where your money is actually going. [There are pink products out there that do help to fund research, etc. — they seem to be in the vast minority, but they do exist.]
And, if you don’t like homework, here are a few great organizations — there are many others, but these are some of my favorites:
*** Metavivor.org ***: [A terrific organization…] From support groups to funding vital research, our programs sustain the power of hope. Passionately committed patients ourselves, we rally public attention to the urgent needs of the metastatic breast cancer (MBC) community, help patients find strength through support and purpose, and make EVERY dollar count as we work with researchers to regain longevity with quality of life.
*** http://www.standup2cancer.org/ ***: [Another great one — and it’s not just for breast cancer. Note that your donation will NOT be BREAST CANCER-specific, but will be directed toward multiple cancers. Since you are reading a breast cancer-specific post I know this may or may not be in line with your philanthropic goals, but if it is, SU2C is an excellent choice.] “Our mission is to fund collaborative, translational cancer research to bring treatments from the bench to the bedside faster, and save lives now.” Since Stand Up To Cancer was founded in May 2008, we have granted $161 Million Dollars to ten Dream Teams of scientists and researchers, one international translational research team and 26 high-risk, high-reward Innovative Research Grants. 100% of public funds go directly into research grants. A portion of the funds that are raised from major donations and third-party fundraising go towards administrative expenses and overhead.
Other Important Organizations:
***A number of people diagnosed in my age bracket have emailed or commented about how Young Survival Coalition (YSC) has helped them. This organization is the premier global organization dedicated to the critical issues unique to young women who are diagnosed with breast cancer. Founded in 1998, YSC’s mission is to serve the roughly 13,000 under 40 (often an under-recognized contingent of the breast cancer population) who are diagnosed with breast cancer each year.
YSC helps these young women by providing support and health information to see them from diagnosis to long-term survivorship. The nonprofit tackles issues specific to this population, like early menopause, effects on fertility, more aggressive cancers and lower survival rates. From YSC, “compared to older women, young women generally face more aggressive cancers and lower survival rates. More and more evidence tells us that breast cancer before age 40 differs biologically from the cancer faced by older women.” Thus, the organization also advocates for increased studies on young women with breast cancer. YSC offers resources, connections and outreach so women feel supported, empowered and hopeful.
***If you are interested in making a difference for through an organization specifically targeting Inflammatory Breast Cancer, I recommend http://www.theibcnetwork.org/: Inflammatory Breast Cancer (IBC) is a rare and highly fatal form of breast cancer that is not typically discovered by mammogram and often occurs prior to standard breast cancer screening age recommendations. Our all volunteer board is focused on education and funding research for this 200 year old orphaned form of breast cancer. No Lump Still Cancer.
…or consider a group that helps cancer patients and their families cope with their illness. For example:
CancerIsAJerk.org — This is a charity my dear friend jme set up to help families touched by cancer. You can make a financial donation or if you’d like to have a tangible something to wear to show your support, you can purchase a “Cancer Is a Jerk” t-shirts with all proceeds going to help actual families touched by cancer. You can also contact jme through the charity if you’d like to sell shirts as a fundraiser with all proceeds going to benefit cancer family applicants in general OR designate a specific family of your choosing.
And don’t underestimate the value of local organizations. My local Breast Cancer Coalition is a perfect example. The Breast Cancer Coalition of Rochester‘s mission is to make the eradication of breast cancer a priority through education and advocacy; to empower women and men to participate fully in decisions relating to breast cancer; to provide support to those coping with a breast cancer diagnosis; and to focus research into the causes, prevention, treatment and cure of breast cancer.
Also local for me is The Karen Carson Crane Foundation. Founded by Karen’s siblings after she died of breast cancer, the mission of the Karen Carson Crane Foundation (“the KCC Foundation”) is to provide support and financial assistance for individuals affected by breast cancer; to encourage breast cancer patients to have the strength, courage and passion to overcome their disease; to support local organizations that assist breast cancer patients; and to donate a portion of its fundraising dollars to organizations that research and promote alternative cancer treatment methods.
There are many other great organizations and groups out there — these are just a few.
And if you can’t help with a financial donation, consider volunteering your time or talents. Perhaps to local cancer patients — bringing a meal or knitting a chemo cap or scarf, or sending a cozy blanket are examples of ways to show your support. I remember when a small box of craft supplies was left on my doorstep when I was first going through chemo — what a gift that was — my kids loved it and it kept them occupied for a little while when I was really ill! Or consider volunteering (or providing non-financial support) at/for a local cancer center, hospital oncology floor, or for an organization that helps cancer patients and/or their families. [If you need help with finding a place to volunteer, etc in your area, please email me with your town/city name & I will do my best to help…]. There are many ways to show your support that don’t require $$.
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And, of course, don’t forget to go for your regular mammograms and to feel your breasts when you can (and report any changes to your doctor) because doing these things IS important. It — what I can loosely call a self-breast exam (but which was really just washing myself in the shower) — is how I found my own lumps, about 17 years before I was due for my first mammogram (according to the recommended screening age back in 2009). If I had ignored my lumps and waited for that first screening mammogram, I can safely say I would have been long dead! So please pay attention to your body and your breasts. While the vast majority of lumps are benign, I still believe it’s always best to bring your breast changes to the attention of your doctor. Thanks for reading…
I will leave you with a picture that I believe is my best advertisement for Breast Cancer Awareness Month:
- Me — 5 Days post bilateral mastectomy and complete ALND (Axillary Lymph Node Dissection)
Side note: The ACTUAL National No Bra Day is July 9th annually. Someone had the great idea to do a braless day during October — Breast Cancer Awareness Month — to support “the cause.” Adding insult to injury, the day they chose — October 13th — is actually the one day out of the whole year designated for Metastatic Breast Cancer Awareness. Sadly, I’ve seen far more No Bra Day awareness advertising circulating around the web than I have Metastatic Breast Cancer Awareness Day info.
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And P.S. — because it seems that clarification is needed for some — this post is NOT about a woman’s choice to wear a bra or not wear a bra. Those comments miss the boat completely. And I do not need a lecture on the merits of going braless. Wear a bra. Don’t wear a bra. That is your choice. Just don’t choose to not wear a bra on one specific day and call it an effort to benefit breast cancer patients or to advance breast cancer research. Raising BREAST AWARENESS you may be, but you are not “supporting BREAST CANCER” by leaving your bra at home.
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cancer in my thirties 
I’ve never had cancer – but thank you for posting this. I’ve been flabbergasted by the pinkwashing, and anytime I’ve questioned it I get a lot of crap about being insensitive to those with cancer. Its one of those things that those who aren’t currently affected by cancer’s impact are afraid to call out – for fear that they’ll come off as insensitive. Outspoken survivors, like you, are the best way to tell these companies to knock it off.
If anything all of this pink awareness has de-sensitized folks to how serious the disease is.
Best of Luck on your continued road to recovery – you are strong and brilliant and I wish you all the best.
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Thank you sheofthemist. I have also not questioned it but remained silently disgusted by the pinkwashing and trivialization of this disease. I appreciate this post and will pray for your healing and strength.
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Thank you so much for your article!!!!!! This is the best article I have ever read!!!! You are awesome!!!
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I often wonder if all this stupid pink crap and all the runs are the reason there is no cure for cancer yet! How would these charities make money? There is no money in cure, only in treatment, we think with our wallets, not our hearts and it is so sad. My mom had it, thankful, she beat it. My best friend has it and has been battling it and the side effects from the “treatments” for 7 years. Breaks my heart.
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One reason there is no cure, Susan, is that skanks like Susan G Komen now only give a paltry 15% or so to actual RESEARCH. They’re too busy funding abortions at Planned Parenthood (who does NOT do mammograms thank you), flying their CEO first class and giving her a upper 6 figure salary.
So sad that so many well meaning individuals and maybe not so well meaning but marketing savvy companies support Komen’s race (aka fundraising) for the “cure” (aka themselves). 😦
We talk about it on SickofPink.com a lot….
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I couldn’t agree more. Stage 3 breast cancer at 31 years old. There’s nothing pleasant as I lay here in this hospital bed still undergoing treatment a year later seeing stupid commercials and products in pink. When had a ribbon ever helped anyone? Never! Give some poor patient a ride to chemo if you want to help.
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I really never thought about it this way. I am a fan of all the Pink the comes out in October, and thought that it was a way for me to say “I feel for you and the journey you and you loved ones have been force to take”. I am disappointed and wonder where is the accountably to the companies that don’t do more. small print is ridiculous and if you are going to support a cause an * shouldn’t be needed. I have been naive about this, while I agree with the braless day is silly, I will continue to wear pink in support but be even more selective on who gets my $$, I’ll continue to walk, give and raise $$, and I am genuinely moved by your pain and perspective. May this year be your best yet.
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Good for you!!! This is an outstanding and thoughtful insight and I applaud you for sharing it. I am so moved by your candor both in sharing your story and expressing your frustration with this issue. Voices like yours should be at the forefront!!!
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Reblogged this on … but I digress.
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Thank you for your article. I have watched 3 surgeries and 6 months of chemo rob my beautiful wife of her energy, day to day life and her dignity. Fund research, not for just a cure but to find the cause so maybe we can stop this. I understand others wanting to show their support – but going without a bra just reminds some of what used to and will no longer be.
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lost a cousin, by marriage several years back to BREAST CANCER, and back in the early 90’s came to know a woman “RAVEN”, who lived about Sebastopol, CA; She suddenly had to have radical surgery. Luckily for her, she had a supportive community of RADICAL WIMMEN, and pulled thru. Some years later, spotted a pix of her in SF in the Medium Strip, promoting what happens, with a half shirt/blouse, exposing the damaged side…Can see how this ‘alleged support’ would irritate one, for myself having to deal with PTSD service connected, only those with a particular diagnoses, grasps what it is all about.. FOR RAVEN, for my cousin who perish… SPEAK OUT, SHOUT OUT !!
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Inspiring story…you are beautiful in all photos. I’ve learned to hate the color pink because of the commercialism and naïveté of use to procure funds for breast cancer research. I am stage 4 metastatic breast cancer -tumors everywhere in bones,lungs and lymph nodes. I didn’t lose my breasts back in 2007 when first diagnosed but I will lose my life after being diagnosed in 2012. There are so many cancers out there that need financial assistance… Think of donating to the American Cancer Society…share the wealth. Susan G. Komen is crap.
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Every one of your statements is true. I was diagnosed with stage 3 inflammatory breast cancer on June 12, 2012 and have gone thru chemo, a double mastectomy and radiation along with numerous infections along the way. Thru out my cancer treatment I refused to “wear pink” or buy the pink ribbons because I felt it trivialized the disease. Breast cancer is not a club that I wanted to join, it is not something that I want to celebrate. I have enough reminders on a daily basis of what the disease can do. I have scars that wrap around 1/2 my body, I have bumps and a scar where my port was located, I have numbness in my right arm from the damage to my nerves when they removed 21 lymph nodes and I have pain every time I lift my arms and bonus of all bonuses I have phantom pain where my breasts used to be. Breast cancer is a horrible disease that affects not only your body, mind and soul it affects your family and friends in ways you can only imagine. So I will not purchase the pink items to support breast cancer but i will give the money directly to the American Cancer Society and then I will quietly wear a ring with a pink stone from my husband as a reminder of how far I’ve come,
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Thanks for raising awareness of the misuse of the pink ribbons. People need to know that just because it’s pink doesn’t mean the money is going where they think it is. However, I think you’re being a little too harsh overall. What’s wrong with someone wanting to wear a pink ribbon to show that they support all breast cancer sufferers and survivors, and remember those that have lost the fight to breast cancer? Yes, the big money aspect sucks, but don’t let it ruin the generally heartfelt support of those who want to wear pink. If you look at the people who wear those pink ribbons, they are probably also sporting several other colors, too. Yellow for support the troops, red for, if I remember correctly, AIDS, etc… I can see why “no bra day” might be offensive, but the idea of pink is not to cutesy up cancer. It’s to raise awareness, and even though big corporations may have tarnished the original intent, you can’t deny that breast cancer awareness HAS been raised because of the pink campaign.
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I’m really happy that I saw this post on FB. I have the deepest sympathy for those suffering from breast cancer, but I have felt the frustration of the Pinktober craze. It isn’t even just an October thing anymore rather it is all year long you see pink everywhere discussing breast cancer. My question is what about the so many other types of cancer taking people’s lives everyday that don’t get the publicity therefore they don’t get the research grants. I suffer from a disease that is rare, so rare that most doctors have never dealt with it leaving them confused about how to treat. My GI organs have systematically shutdown, I no longer have a stomach, my intestines no longer work despite many surgeries and attempts to use a feeding tube in my small intestine, my kidneys go in and out of renal failure, and the malnutrition and constant central line infections has caused permanent heart damage. There is no cure, and as a last resort a multi visceral (five organ) transplant is performed. Most of the victims claimed by the disease a young women, not to say that it can devastate at any age. And the disease that I suffer from is one of many rare diseases that there is no awareness being raised. I want to see a cure for breast cancer because it is awful that so many have to suffer through all of this, but should we not give equal attention to other horrible diseases? Sorry if I sounded insensitive because that was not my intention at all, I just spend so much time in the hospital and I see people who are fighting these horrible diseases without anyone even knowing what they are…all of these diseases are so bad and companies shouldn’t be profiting off of other people’s pain.
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Want to thank you for such a great article – it deserves to have gone viral! Power to the anti-pink! I’m a two-timer with breast cancer, first at 32, then at 42. Double mastectomy the second time around. Major kudos for putting up that post-op picture. Nothing “pink” about having breasts removed, and will we ever forget those drat drains? In any case, keep on keepin’ on and thanks for giving us all something wonderful to post to combat all the “think pink” garbage this month. xo
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Thank you for posting this reply. I couldn’t agree with you more. It is nice to see the support of others wearing pink.
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Brilliant! And thank you! I’m pinked out too. Cancers not cute and its not pretty. And to be honest, I don’t need a visual every time I turn around. I have a 12″ scar to do that for me. As an ovarian cancer survivor, it drives me nuts that everyone automatically thinks that because I’m female and had cancer, it must have been breast. And don’t get me wrong, the research that goes into breast cancer benefits all of us who have been diagnosed. But my preference is to give to organizations that fund a variety of cancers’ research. Giant kudos to you for your honesty and courage.
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Cancer in my 30’s thank you!!!! Thank you for helping me snuff out Facebook posts that have shared the October 13th advertised as “National No Bra Day” picture and as a “fun” way to support people with breast cancer has pushed me over the edge.
Some have bantered back but, what pleased me, eventually the owner of the post began to delete their rants once I posted your blog as a comment. THANK YOU!!!!!!!! ~D
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Thank you, Diane! Xoxo
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PS your thumbbnail with the post of the URL is worth a thousand words. Sorry, I know it’s not pretty but, it’s effective because it truly is the real deal. You are an inspiration for sharing.
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Xoxo
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Well said!!! my sentiments to a T 🙂
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I too am a survivor and you could not have stated this better…I HATE pink and refuse to wear any ribbons or any of it. I did the race for the cure a little over a year after my diagnosis just to prove that I could do it. Thank you for writing this and may you continue to heal and be healthy.
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I could be wrong, but isn’t it because bras supposedly encourage breast cancer by cutting off then lymphatic system around the breasts?
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Thank you for sharing your story…well said. You are always in my prayers!
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I hear ya sister!! Going bra less seems like a bad idea any day of the year but in October at the start of brisk fall weather?! No bueno. My mother is a recent breast cancer survivor as well, surviving a double mastectomy, a near fatal infection from chemo that almost took her life (typhlitis), and 35 nearly back to back radiation treatments. You all have endured pain and suffering on so many physical and emotional levels that I just can’t imagine. Many foolishly think the journey is over once the breasts are removed and the treatments are completed. But the journey is actually just the beginning. I don’t mean to make this message suddenly sound like a cry for help but if any survivors have any ideas for how to help my 68 year old mom with her depression, lethargy, and overall feeling of yuck please share. Her radiation ended in June and despite a negative blood test she fears she still has cancer (she is a retired RN). I don’t have any idea how to help her.
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I agree with you very much. Your picture say more than word could every describe or say. God bless you.
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Thank you so much for sharing your story. Nothing like hearing from a survivor about how the impact of actions that are thought out to be helpful. Such power in your words and your story.
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I have not had to deal with breast cancer personally but something about all that pink has always rubbed me the wrong way. However, I never felt I had the right to say something about it. It was all about a club that I was thankful to not be in. You have so beautifully expressed exactly what I have felt about all this commercialism. Thank you!
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I’m a lung cancer advocate and started my own nonprofit 7 years ago and a co-op of 20 organizations 5 years ago. I also sat in the celebrity phone bank at the very first Stand Up 2 Cancer in 2008 and I was glad to see them at the top of your list! I think what they have done is pretty awesome too. I also subscribe to BCAN (Breast Cancer Action Network) just so I can hear them expose all of the pinkwashing that goes on by big brands every October, its a little nauseating but a good read. But I want to just thank you for your candor. It’s raw and refreshing and over the years I’ve read many breast cancer patients/survivors/and caregivers blog posts and heard them talk about pinkwashing and how it infuriates them. It’s a shame that pink kinda stinks now. But I think you’re photo should be on a billboard! I only wish that lung cancer patients had the same courage as you do to talk about their disease openly and not feel so ashamed. (Because I’d put one of their pics on a billboard in a second.) Thanks again. I just shared it on Twitter too!
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Thank you for raising this kind of awareness. Though I am not a fan of the “no bra day” I do hold to a tiny portion of “pink for the cure”. My mother went to be with the LORD on June 15, 2012. The pink simply reminds me that this recognition started somewhere and I am “on the train” to simply encourage women to have the mammograms and to remember those fighting. The WORD says “All things in moderation” and I thank you for bringing to my attention to moderate how I will support Breast Cancer Awareness in the future.
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Reblogged this on Posthuman and commented:
not my usual subject matter, but important nonetheless
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I find that a lot of people say they support those with breast cancer, but their “support” doesn’t really go beyond SAYING they support them. I can’t afford to give financially, but DO have a skill I can offer. I’m a photographer. And a friend suggested I… “Maybe donate some “photography time” to women going through any stage of their battle to help them feel empowered and beautiful.” What is your thought on this? Would my effort be “supportive”? Thank you! Marc
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Marc Maksim – I adore the idea of you offering photography services, particularly for those with terminal cancer. It’s so important to the family to have such photos that can show so much about the loved one.
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Thank you for your comment and question, Marc. Yes, I think that sharing your talent as a photographer would be a great way to show your support. It would be wonderful of you to offer this service and I wish you well with doing it. Thank you!
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I can only say thank you! I am a survivor witha similair story and I felt as if you are speaking from my own heart. My sister and I were diagnosed 3 moths apart, both under the magic age for screening. They fought her getting her mamogram and I insisted based on my diagnosis. She is now batteling her second mets diagnosis. First to the bones and now lung and peritoneium. Your words ring so true and wise. With so much love for your brave attitude and I love that you have humor. It has been my best fight.
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You are an amazing person. Keep fighting and stay strong.
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Love your post and I totally agree. I am a 15 year survivor of metastatic breast cancer, mentor others with stage 4 cancer, lobby on Capitol Hill for real breast cancer causes and sit on panels to review potential breast cancer research funding proposals. I hate Pinktober. I wrote about it recently on my blog “#@$*-Off for Breast Cancer Awareness” at sandraspiveysite.wordpress.com. I hope you have time to take a peek.
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Thank you for this great article. I shared it tonight during a Twitter party I hosted on pinkwashing. I am also sharing it on my Pinkwashing Hall of Shame board on Pinterest and on the Pinkwashing Hall of Shame on Facebook.
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Thank you.
I’ve been trying to rid my facebook feed of these posts also.
I lost my mother to secondary breast cancer shortly after my 21st birthday 3 years ago, and seeing it being so trivialised with “free the tatas” type slogans has had me absolutely foaming.
Your photo is an all too familiar sight, and I’m so glad you had the bravery to post it.
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Thank you for sharing this. I am also a breast cancer survivor, diagnosed at 36 and had a bi lateral mastectomy. Your picture brought back so many memories from my surgery.
We are more than a color that companies abuse to make a profit. I have been extremely blessed to be part of trial studies to keep my cancer from coming back and to help thousands of women to remain cancer free. Donating directly to an organization does so much more than buying something pink.
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Thank you for sharing your heart. I also was curious about how this was supportive but having lost a sister to breast cancer 10 years ago, I shared the no bra day. to be honest I knew it would get the attention of my male friends. I will proudly now share your story.
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Thank you for writing this. Please know that deodorants and anti-perspirents have a strong correlation with breast cancer and lymph node cancers too. I make my own now. aluminum free baking soda, tee tree oil, guar gum and coconut oil. it works and is completely harmless. I hope the support you’ve gotten from writing this amazing piece will touch you where you mist need it, in the parts that have been so challenged by all you have endured. Best regards, Sheri
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I was diagnosed with breast cancer in October 2010. Left the doctor’s office, had a week to come to grips with losing my left breast. Drove back to my hometown and had to go into the grocery store. I was greeted by a huge breast cancer balloon ribbon. I see the ribbons all year long, but in October it is EVERYWHERE. On flagpoles, on end display shelves in hardware stores, on my toilet paper. And then I go to the cash and they ask if I’d like to donate $2 for breast cancer. Last year I confess that I lost it and told some poor 20ish year old male cashier:” I’ve already donated my left breast to breast cancer”. The pink is out of control. I struggle to feel “normal” three years later. I appreciate research and support, but, most of the time, when I see the pink, I can’t get to “great to see this support”. What I see is the doctor in the office looking at me with grim sympathy, and telling me “You know, once it gets to the lymph nodes, it usually knows how to get to other places”. And then I think of my two children, and wonder: “will I see them graduate from high school?”
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I am a cancer RN. I do not believe it ethical to make money off another’s illness! I will not buy pink just because. It is NOT because I lack empathy, rather, I would prefer any money spent on pink stuff be kept and given to those in need going through treatment. A direct deposit where it is needed. Than you for your input, how nice to receive a word from a patient. You are the one I live and work for! Thank you! ❤
Thank you for being brave enough to share your experiences!
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I so agree! I feel this way about a lot of things, like when the men refuse to shave for an entire month to support breast cancer. Really? Unless they are raising money each day for how long they are going without shaving and then donating it to the Breast Cancer Foundation, how is that being supportive? I had this argument with my husband, telling him that men were using breast cancer awareness as an excuse to be lazy and it just irritated me. If as a society we are going to be supportive, let’s do something that actually matters. My breast cancer was caught early and I only had to have a lumpectomy and undergo radiation treatments, but I am still young and the fact that I had cancer at all was pretty scary. I am all for supporting a great cause, but let’s do it right.
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You are amazing. Keep fighting, And I couldn’t go braless if I wanted to, but I thought this was a ridiculous idea to begin with.
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You are beautiful inside and out. Having known women that have had breast cancer and others that have past to the other side, I find that these tactics of pinking everything and anything a publicity stunt to sugar coat what this ugly cancer really is. I think that showing your picture is what needs to happen in the eyes of the public. They do it at St. Jude, why not with breast cancer. I hope that from the words of encouragement of strangers that you can see that you have made an impact on many people and not everyone believes that this is how woman need to support this cause. I will not be throwing my bra to the curb on October 13th, but maybe seeing if I can help at our local Oncology center. Thank you for your inspiration of what truly matters for woman in your situation for others can be naïve about this. I will be praying for you and your family.
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Thank you so much for sharing your story. I am a stage IV colon cancer survivor and I appreciate you putting a face on the battle with cancer. It is not about the month or the color but about the survivors and their families.
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Thank you so much for this post. More people need to read what you have to say (so I’ve facebooked, pinned, and tweeted). Your writing matters.
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Thank you for a very informative and inspiring post. My mom was also a survivor, who didn’t die from breast cancer, despite being given a year-and-a-half to live by the first doctor she saw. Mom then got a second opinion from a teaching hospital that specialized in cancer treatment, and it truly saved her life. Back then, Mom and others who suffered from a breast cancer diagnosis received a lot of help from a hotline, staffed by only breast cancer survivors. It was called “Why Me?” or “Y-me?” The number was 1-800-221-2141. They were staffed 24 hours and 7 days-a-week. After calling, the ladies would receive a lot of very helpful, supportive, educational information in the mail, if they had shared their addresses. All of the support, counseling, and information were provided free of charge too. If they are still operating the hotline, I recommend it highly to all survivors.
God bless you and heal you!
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Thank you – I lost my only sister to breast cancer 4 years ago, and live in the shadow of the disease. Thank you for your honesty and for telling the truth about the blatant commercialism and consumerism behind the aggressive pink campaign.
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This blog resonated with me in a way that I can’t accurately explain. I’m so sorry for your bodily loss, and for having to continually tolerate the ignorance and ludicrous nature of our society.
I pray that by the time my children are grown, that society will have improved, and that instead of buying something to ease the pang of feeling we get when we see a story like yours, that it can stop… feel… grieve, and then go out and be a real comfort and support to someone suffering because of cancer.. or anything for that matter.
I hope that one day you will be rid of your pain, and that you will have a sense of accomplishment from opening people’s eyes with your personal story.
Best wishes, love and support from the bottom of my heart.
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