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***10/9/2013: I have been completely overwhelmed by the number of visitors this post has received in the past few days (over 130,000 at last count!). I am not sure who first shared it — or who continues to share it — but I want to THANK YOU all for visiting, reading, and sharing it. I think the realities of breast cancer are so often trivialized and “pinkified” so I am sincerely grateful to everyone who has taken the time to read or share my blog. I am sorry to say that my story is just one of many, but with your help, we may just be able to do something to change that. Please feel free to leave me a comment or to share your own story below — or send an email: cancerinmythirties@yahoo.com. Thank you all. ***
Peter Griffin / Family Guy “What Grinds My Gears” Episode
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I am not a ranter by any means and I have been pretty quiet about “Pinktober” and what has come to be known as “Pinkwashing” in breast cancer circles, but seeing October 13th advertised as “National No Bra Day” and as a “fun” way to support people with breast cancer has pushed me over the edge.
Are you kidding me? How on earth could a day where girls and women are encouraged to post and share photos of their braless breasts and to walk around with their nipples poking through their shirts be “supportive” for women who are living with or who have died from breast cancer, or who have managed to ‘complete’ the arduous treatments and disfiguring surgeries required to put them into remission?
I think the answer is simple. It is not.
Like so many women–and men–who have faced this disease, I have lost my breasts to cancer. Though I had a terrific surgeon, it was a physically and emotionally disfiguring surgery.
The cancer had gone so deep and was so extensive on my left side that it was at first inoperable. Even after months of chemo, my surgeon took as much tissue and skin as possible and went deep into my axilla (underarm area). The cancer had metastasized to my lymph nodes and had invaded them to such a degree that they broke open to allow the cancer cells to go beyond the walls of the nodes. Because of how invasive the surgery was and of how much nerve damage, etc. resulted, it was not only extremely painful then, but continues to be a source of pain and phantom sensations that affect my entire upper torso even today.
I required over a year of physical therapy just to be able to raise my arms again and I still don’t have full function or range of motion. And, because of pain, swelling, conspicuous compression sleeves and gloves, I am constantly reminded of the lymphedema that resulted from the surgery and loss of my lymph nodes. Oh, and the life-threatening infections that forced a couple of hospitalizations and four months of massive doses of antibiotics this summer (almost 2 years after my original surgery), are also a little reminder of some of the things that the bilateral mastectomy and lymph node surgeries have left me with. And there is so much more…
So the thought of seeing bra-less women flaunting two body parts that I have lost to cancer — more than I already see this on a regular day — does not feel all that supportive. In fact, it feels quite the opposite.
I think of myself as an open-minded person. I do my best not to judge others or their beliefs and ideals. I have a pretty good sense of humor and am usually the first to poke fun at myself. And I make light of breast cancer and my struggles, treatments and their side effects, lack of breasts, fear of death, etc. fairly frequently. It is how I cope. But, given what I have been through, I think I have earned the right to joke and make light of how this terrible disease has affected me. But if you haven’t been there or taken care of someone who has been there, then you should think twice before you publicize a day that jokes about putting the first body parts we usually lose to this disease “out there” on display even more conspicuously and then labeling it as an activity that helps our ’cause’.
We live in a society that makes a huge hoopla about breast cancer while at the very same time trivializing the seriousness of the disease. How can we be so contradictory?
While I am beyond thrilled that breast cancer is no longer a taboo issue and that people are talking about it, the commercialism has gotten out of hand. There is nothing pink and rosy about breast cancer, yet it has been pink-washed to death. It is a serious disease that kills.
And while I do think we need more awareness and education (about metastatic disease, about how young women CAN develop breast cancer, about how women (young and not so young) DO die from this disease, about the importance of research, etc.), I don’t think we need the kind of awareness that buying a jar of salsa with a pink ribbon on it brings. While I hardly ever see “awareness” products addressing the topics above, I can’t go anywhere without seeing pink products. Heck, I just have to look out of my front window to see giant pink garbage totes. 
The stores are filled with pink as companies try to make a buck off breast cancer. If you look carefully at these products, you’ll find that some of them don’t even donate a cent to breast cancer awareness, support, research, etc. And oftentimes those that do make a very minimal donation — and not always to organizations/programs where the money is well spent. Case in point — during a recent trip to my grocery store’s pink breast cancer section, I found (after reading the small print) that the maximum per item donation to the breast cancer “cause” was $0.35. An abysmal $0.35 for a $25.00 plastic coffee mug! And, guess what, once that $0.35 reaches “the cause,” a portion of it is lost to overhead, salaries and advertising costs.
One of the most unfortunate issues here is that well-meaning people are willing to buy pink products, even pay a little extra, because they think they are helping to do something to “cure” breast cancer or to provide “hope” to breast cancer patients. Why is this sad? Because those dollars spent on pink key chains, pink beer koozies, pink boxes of crackers and pink plastic water bottles could be going to fund research into metastatic disease, better (and less harmful) treatments, the elusive “cure” and, dare I say it, PREVENTION.
My intention is not to offend or to hurt the feelings of anyone who is genuinely trying to help, but I think it is important for you to know the truth. So please put your bra back on, put down those pink garbage bags (unless you really like pink that much!), that pink “awareness” pepper spray keychain, and that pink breast cancer “awareness” vibrator and dildo (yes, I’m blushing and yes, these are real things that their merchandisers say will “help you raise breast cancer awareness” — though they are shipped discretely in plain, unmarked boxes so no one knows what you purchased) and send a few dollars to an organization that devotes their fundraising dollars to research. You just have to do a bit of homework or read the labels on those pink items to see where your money is actually going. [There are pink products out there that do help to fund research, etc. — they seem to be in the vast minority, but they do exist.]
And, if you don’t like homework, here are a few great organizations — there are many others, but these are some of my favorites:
*** Metavivor.org ***: [A terrific organization…] From support groups to funding vital research, our programs sustain the power of hope. Passionately committed patients ourselves, we rally public attention to the urgent needs of the metastatic breast cancer (MBC) community, help patients find strength through support and purpose, and make EVERY dollar count as we work with researchers to regain longevity with quality of life.
*** http://www.standup2cancer.org/ ***: [Another great one — and it’s not just for breast cancer. Note that your donation will NOT be BREAST CANCER-specific, but will be directed toward multiple cancers. Since you are reading a breast cancer-specific post I know this may or may not be in line with your philanthropic goals, but if it is, SU2C is an excellent choice.] “Our mission is to fund collaborative, translational cancer research to bring treatments from the bench to the bedside faster, and save lives now.” Since Stand Up To Cancer was founded in May 2008, we have granted $161 Million Dollars to ten Dream Teams of scientists and researchers, one international translational research team and 26 high-risk, high-reward Innovative Research Grants. 100% of public funds go directly into research grants. A portion of the funds that are raised from major donations and third-party fundraising go towards administrative expenses and overhead.
Other Important Organizations:
***A number of people diagnosed in my age bracket have emailed or commented about how Young Survival Coalition (YSC) has helped them. This organization is the premier global organization dedicated to the critical issues unique to young women who are diagnosed with breast cancer. Founded in 1998, YSC’s mission is to serve the roughly 13,000 under 40 (often an under-recognized contingent of the breast cancer population) who are diagnosed with breast cancer each year.
YSC helps these young women by providing support and health information to see them from diagnosis to long-term survivorship. The nonprofit tackles issues specific to this population, like early menopause, effects on fertility, more aggressive cancers and lower survival rates. From YSC, “compared to older women, young women generally face more aggressive cancers and lower survival rates. More and more evidence tells us that breast cancer before age 40 differs biologically from the cancer faced by older women.” Thus, the organization also advocates for increased studies on young women with breast cancer. YSC offers resources, connections and outreach so women feel supported, empowered and hopeful.
***If you are interested in making a difference for through an organization specifically targeting Inflammatory Breast Cancer, I recommend http://www.theibcnetwork.org/: Inflammatory Breast Cancer (IBC) is a rare and highly fatal form of breast cancer that is not typically discovered by mammogram and often occurs prior to standard breast cancer screening age recommendations. Our all volunteer board is focused on education and funding research for this 200 year old orphaned form of breast cancer. No Lump Still Cancer.
…or consider a group that helps cancer patients and their families cope with their illness. For example:
CancerIsAJerk.org — This is a charity my dear friend jme set up to help families touched by cancer. You can make a financial donation or if you’d like to have a tangible something to wear to show your support, you can purchase a “Cancer Is a Jerk” t-shirts with all proceeds going to help actual families touched by cancer. You can also contact jme through the charity if you’d like to sell shirts as a fundraiser with all proceeds going to benefit cancer family applicants in general OR designate a specific family of your choosing.
And don’t underestimate the value of local organizations. My local Breast Cancer Coalition is a perfect example. The Breast Cancer Coalition of Rochester‘s mission is to make the eradication of breast cancer a priority through education and advocacy; to empower women and men to participate fully in decisions relating to breast cancer; to provide support to those coping with a breast cancer diagnosis; and to focus research into the causes, prevention, treatment and cure of breast cancer.
Also local for me is The Karen Carson Crane Foundation. Founded by Karen’s siblings after she died of breast cancer, the mission of the Karen Carson Crane Foundation (“the KCC Foundation”) is to provide support and financial assistance for individuals affected by breast cancer; to encourage breast cancer patients to have the strength, courage and passion to overcome their disease; to support local organizations that assist breast cancer patients; and to donate a portion of its fundraising dollars to organizations that research and promote alternative cancer treatment methods.
There are many other great organizations and groups out there — these are just a few.
And if you can’t help with a financial donation, consider volunteering your time or talents. Perhaps to local cancer patients — bringing a meal or knitting a chemo cap or scarf, or sending a cozy blanket are examples of ways to show your support. I remember when a small box of craft supplies was left on my doorstep when I was first going through chemo — what a gift that was — my kids loved it and it kept them occupied for a little while when I was really ill! Or consider volunteering (or providing non-financial support) at/for a local cancer center, hospital oncology floor, or for an organization that helps cancer patients and/or their families. [If you need help with finding a place to volunteer, etc in your area, please email me with your town/city name & I will do my best to help…]. There are many ways to show your support that don’t require $$.
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And, of course, don’t forget to go for your regular mammograms and to feel your breasts when you can (and report any changes to your doctor) because doing these things IS important. It — what I can loosely call a self-breast exam (but which was really just washing myself in the shower) — is how I found my own lumps, about 17 years before I was due for my first mammogram (according to the recommended screening age back in 2009). If I had ignored my lumps and waited for that first screening mammogram, I can safely say I would have been long dead! So please pay attention to your body and your breasts. While the vast majority of lumps are benign, I still believe it’s always best to bring your breast changes to the attention of your doctor. Thanks for reading…
I will leave you with a picture that I believe is my best advertisement for Breast Cancer Awareness Month:
- Me — 5 Days post bilateral mastectomy and complete ALND (Axillary Lymph Node Dissection)
Side note: The ACTUAL National No Bra Day is July 9th annually. Someone had the great idea to do a braless day during October — Breast Cancer Awareness Month — to support “the cause.” Adding insult to injury, the day they chose — October 13th — is actually the one day out of the whole year designated for Metastatic Breast Cancer Awareness. Sadly, I’ve seen far more No Bra Day awareness advertising circulating around the web than I have Metastatic Breast Cancer Awareness Day info.
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And P.S. — because it seems that clarification is needed for some — this post is NOT about a woman’s choice to wear a bra or not wear a bra. Those comments miss the boat completely. And I do not need a lecture on the merits of going braless. Wear a bra. Don’t wear a bra. That is your choice. Just don’t choose to not wear a bra on one specific day and call it an effort to benefit breast cancer patients or to advance breast cancer research. Raising BREAST AWARENESS you may be, but you are not “supporting BREAST CANCER” by leaving your bra at home.
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cancer in my thirties 
Thank you and Amen! Yes, the best way to support Breast Cancer research is through the organizations you mention; the commercialization has gone too far.
Bless you and may God give you continued good health; you are truth. ❤
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I’m a 20 year breast cancer survivor…diagnosed at 35 years old when I had 4 young boys ages 1, 5, 7 & 10. Scared doesn’t even begin to describe my emotions at that time. I can relate so much to what you said. I too joked about my breast cancer (I can’t die, my husband isn’t capable of taking care of 4 young boys! or “I can’t get divorced, who would marry me again, I only have one boob!) I remember reading a post in Dear Abby from a farmer’s wife who was having a mastectomy…she worried about getting reconstruction. Her husband told her not to worry, it was only a boob! She was back working the farm within weeks of her surgery. That put things in perspective for me, and I too didn’t get reconstructive surgery. I was told I had to wait 2 years after the mastectomy because I had a large tumor and what the doctor’s didn’t say was that they were afraid of it metastasizing. Thank God it didn’t, but after 2 years, I was very reluctant to undergo surgery again. I had some heart issues that they found just before the surgery, and that scared me into not undergoing surgery unless absolutely necessary. Turns out I had a bi-cuspid heart valve that needed to be replaced 15 years later. I have more scars on my chest than I’d like to admit, but my wonderful husband concurred with that farmer a long time ago – it’s just a boob! I am eternally grateful that I’ve had all these years with my boys to see them graduate from high school and college, 2 of them get married, and one even present us with a granddaughter! I know what you are saying about the pink stuff…it’s too much. I have recently had a friend who’s 9 year old grandson was diagnosed with bone cancer. There is so little support and research on childhood cancer…it just doesn’t seem right. I really appreciate all the breast cancer awareness, but other cancers need awareness too…and this from a breast cancer survivor! My father died at 54 years old in 1990 of lymphoma – there was so little information on that cancer at the time.
About the no bra thing – This comes under the heading “what were they thinking???” I will never take a picture of myself with no bra on for others to see. I understand why some people want to do that, and I’ll leave it to them. The only people who have ever seen me without a bra are my husband, medical professionals, and the woman who fits me for my prosthesis and bras!
I could go on and on…but you seem to cover the topic pretty well! Keep it up.
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You are an amazing young woman with a great spirit and I like what you’re saying. I too am tired of pink things that have nothing to do with breast cancer. I am a 5 year survivor still struggling with reconstruction issues and I agree with the no bra day not being supportive to this cause. Thank you for the great words. All the best to you on your journey. “hugs”
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I agree !!! When I see/hear all of the “sayings” and”funny” pictures supposedly supporting b.c. awareness I think of my sister and the other women that have gone through this. It is so sad to me that our society has put so much emphasis on women’s breast they have lost all sight and feeling for the woman that has to deal with something like b.c..
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Thank you for sharing this important perspective!! I think the commercialization of breast cancer is out of hand – yet another way for marketers to take advantage of women in the quest for more money. Your voice and the voice of other survivors and their loved ones are the most important antidote to the egregious treatment of breast cancer in the media so keep on doing what you’re doing! All the best to you.
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As a caregiver for my daughter who has osteosarcoma my heart goes out to you. I have come to hate the color pink as when asked about her loss of hair everyone asked… do you have breast cancer? By the way those questions asked after her amputation, now people just stare at her.
Why are we spending money on pink things when there are so many types of cancer out there killing people. Why is it not October Cancer awareness month? Followed my every other disease out there that kills. Heart disease month, Diabetes month…etc. WE have 12 months…fill them.
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what about susan g komen? is this a good org? I do the walk every year but you didnt mention it. your story is very real and.appreciated. thank you.
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What bugs me is that all these promotions are for finding a cure for cancer. Why is there little to no research for preventing cancer? It’s been shown that excellent nutrition (primarily a vegan diet heavy on dark greens, beans, seeds, berries and the like) is a major preventative towards cancer. But that sort of stuff is rarely shown to us as consumers of medicine. I don’t want to sound like a conspiracy theorist, but I really do think that the Big Pharmaceutical companies have a very heavy hand in saying where our donations go.
I’ve walked the 60 km Weekend to end Breast Cancer several times and yes, it was incredibly inspiring to acknowledge at the finish line those women and some men who were survivors, but it was also with a sense of sadness that they had to go through that agony in the first place. I’m not saying that all cancers can be prevented by diet alone, I’m not even saying that all cancers can be prevented period, but I sure would like to see proactiveness instead of reactiveness when dealing with the dragon!
Thank you for writing this…standing up against pinkwashing is sometimes seen as anti support for ‘victims’ of breast cancer and we’re often vilified for doing so. You blog post has put into words what has been roiling around in my head for ages. On a side note, while I was typing this one fingered on my tablet, I kept misspelling breast as ‘beast’, however in relation to breast cancer perhaps it should be called Beast Cancer!
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actually, there have been recent studies saying bras actually increase your odds of breast cancer so, keep the bra off http://www.cheeseslave.com/want-to-prevent-breast-cancer-burn-your-bra/
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Thank you so much for sharing your story. I have not been directly affected by breast cancer, though I have friends who have been. I have often wondered about the effectiveness of all those pink products and felt like it had to be somewhat scammy, but hated to say so since I didn’t really know. I have not understood a lot of the things that go into Breast Cancer Awareness, such as this no-bra day. I am glad to see an actual cancer survivor tell me these things don’t make sense.
Good luck on your journey to recovery.
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THanks you for your candor. I hate pink but I really hate it this month. I have metastatic breast cancer. I was initially diagnosed at 34 and mine came back 3 years later. The day that is so nicely chosen as “No Bra Day” is actually “Metastatic Cancer Awareness Day” So when I heard about No Bra Day I was even more offended. I hope people pay more attention and realize that breast cancer or MBC is not joke. I thank you for your words of wisdom and hope they continue to spread.
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I am standing up saying, “YES!! YES!!! YES!!!!!”
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We had to go buy pink socks for our daughter so she could match her team during the game tonight… thanks for sharing this; I will share it with the parents who thought it was an great idea to pinkwash our middle school daughters’ lives.
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Thank You, Pink Sister!
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Amen. I’ve lost too much of my own life & too many friends to this disease. Every time you think someone could not come up with another pink campaign worse than the ones we’ve already seen, they do.
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Thanks. I’ve been feeling and saying the same for years, even b4 my dx and treatment. I found my lump thanks to a self exam at the age of 35. While you mention good charities, I want to also throw out there young survival coalition ysc that helps the younger women facing breast cancer. Youngsurvival.org. although I do admit to wearing pinkbribbon embossed socks.
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Thank you for sharing, and for posting your post-surgery photo, which I found compellingly beautiful.
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Thank you for your honesty and openness I am saddened to think that something that most people “think” helps, make life even slightly harder for anyone who is already having to deal with so much. Thankfully I don’t have first hand knowledge of what you are going through but unfortunately have witnessed family members having to suffer. My thoughts are with you on your difficult journey.
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hi. this post had reached me in south africa via facebook.
thanks for your honesty. in SA thankfully we dont gave a no bra day. we do however have pink everywhere and an annual shavathon. shaving all your hair off in solidarity with those undergoing treatment requires way more commitment than just throwing ut titties about. whoever thought up that idea is a moron…and its a woman then shes a double moron. i wish u well and thanks again for a great read.
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I am moved by your words.
I applaud you for your corageous writing and for being the voice that had needed to be heard for so long now.
May God bless you and yours and keep being an inspiration!!!
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Ovarian cancer survivor here and the think I hate the most about Pinktober is all the cutie little names for breasts. Please! They are breasts. Calling them boobies and tatas and anything else just makes them sound like playthings which men would apparently agree with. They are my breasts and were a working part of my body. The nicknames are demeaning.
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Thank you so much for your transparency. As one who has a parent that is a cancer survivor, it is definitely not something I think of in any cutesy way. God bless you for your courage and determination. You are an inspiration, truly.
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I think the whole pinkwashing syndrome is a symptom of the continuing american sexualization of breasts. Somehow we cant deal with breast cancer unless we make it cute and slap pink ribbons all over it, or make it sexy and call for women to go braless. Somehow this is supposed to make breast cancer less threatening and more “fun” to support without making us feel awkward. Thank you for your bravery in showing us the real face of breast cancer and providing us with some real ways to support sufferers and survivors.
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Thank you for writing this. There is nothing pretty about breast cancer
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Here is another truly committed non-profit that contributes 100% funds raised to breast cancer research. The Terri Brodeur Breast Cancer Foundation. In 7 years, this 100% volunteer run organization had granted $2.4 million to research, monitored by a scientific panel. More at http://www.tbbcf.org. Many thanks for a great blog.
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Thank you for sharing that resource. I am going to write them and see if we can co-fund some research.
Terry Arnold
founder, The IBC Network
dx TN IBC summer of 2007
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Thank you, Marilyn. I will add them to the list!
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I also was diagnosed in my 30’s and underwent a double mastectomy, recinstruction and 4 months of chemo. That was 7 yeas ago and next month I go under the knife yet again to modify my reconstruction.
Sign…how to express the anger and frustration of being whored out as a commodity, a fund raising tool if you will. They say cancer shouldn’t defines but every October that’s exactly what it does. And I miss my nipples so damn much that if someone were to flaunt no-bra day to me in October (when I’m short fused anyway) I think I might go nuclear.
I know folks think they are being our cheerleaders with these stupid games on Facebook or selling pink candles but what they don’t realize is they are not only disrespecting us survivors, they are trivializing the worst even of our lives into a game or a fund raising technique. We’ve nailed awareness. I don’t think there is a single human being in the first world countries who isn’t aware of the monster that is breast cancer. Now let’s fund vaccines & stem cell research and find a darn cure.
Bless you, beautiful. You are a fricking rock star in my book. You and I are of the same tribe…a club that I wish neither of us had received an invitation.
God Bless you. Wendi
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Okay. I’ll tell all of the male and female athletes to forget about pink in October. Ill tell them to take the laces out of their cleats. Remove the wristbands. Don’t wear the socks. Ill tell them that they should forget about any social awareness that they may be interested in if doesn’t involve them throwing their piggy banks on the floor and sending their coins to a local hospital. I don’t have cancer but I may get it. My father died of cancer. My mother died from complications from cancer. Awareness is not nothing. I understand your position but don’t attack people who are working on awareness and social responsibility. I am sorry for your grief.
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My prayers go with you for healing and peace. Thank you so much for bringing such contemplative discussion to the table. It’s amazing to me that you are able to carry such brilliant and eloquent discussions amidst such a painful recovery process. You are a gift to the world for sharing these thoughts! Peace and comfort be with you….
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Colour me shallow, but when I was stunned with my own diagnosis, it happened to be at the beginning of pink month! I actually did feel a bit less alone seeing all the pink – and there were more resources to help me decide what to do as the libraries had them all out on display. I was reeling- did not have the energy to go seek them out, but when I walked in and saw them, it helped.
Of course, I do think your points are very valid, now a few years on, and will look into which products actually do result in research cash… Thank you for your blog- I just found it.
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Love your post, and your pic – you are beautiful! I too hate the pink. It is only a reminder that cancer took my mom when I was 11, and that I too may have to deal with it some day. And I really feel that if yogurt companies want to stop cancer, they should stop putting hormones in milk (and so much sugar!) and not make single moms eating yogurt pay their own postage to allow them donate 10 cents to cancer. If they cared that much they would donate anyway! Hate the bins too – what is the message: put trash in this to support cancer? Support cancer while needlessly filling up the landfill and buying loads of products you probably didn’t need anyway because they donate 10 cents to cancer? What?! I’ve always said if you want to support cancer, support someone who has cancer, don’t support some company giving money to research which you may or may not even agree with if you actually read what studies they are doing. A cancer awareness compost bin might be better! lol. Keep strong and stay away from all those pink products! 🙂
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Thanks so much for your article, I totally agree with everything you said.
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Thank you for this post! I am an Ovarian and Uterine Cancer Survivor (recently re-diagnosed with Metastatic Uterine Cancer). I have been unhappy with the pink since my original diagnosis in 2008. I keep getting told that I’m bitter because there is nothing Teal it Peach (colors for my cancers) but its not that. We need to focus on ALL cancers not just one. We need to strive for a common goal of Awareness and a Cure. That’s my rant. That being said, keep up the good work!
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God Bless You on this journey, and you are an amazing soul. I am not dealing wit breast cancer nor is any of my family members, however we as a family are dealing with aggressive late stage prostrate cancer , in my dad. He is too old in the doctor’s eyes to have surgery, in my eye’s he is my dad , the greatest man , a little girl could have (i am 40 ) lol. anyways he proudly wears a tee shirts that was a fundraiser here in winnipeg manitoba , through a radio station that says eff u cancer……..
shirts were20 bucks all proceeds when to prostate cancer research. better than a pink garbage can any day, and boy let me tell you he sure made alot of people smile in cancer care on his radiation days.
you hang in there, and i wish you may sun filled days,
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You are strong and awesome. Thank you for being so honest and sharing so much.
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Reblogged this on k a r a h ~ l i n.
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Pingback: October is Breast Awareness Month | Jessica Gottlieb A Los Angeles Mom
I just lost my right breast and 9 lymph nodes to cancer. That’s the bad news. The good news is that they caught it super-early (regular mammogram, ladies!) and they got all the cancer with the surgery so no post-surgical treatment (radiation/chemo/estrogen-block) for me! Oh! and FREE BOOB JOB! Woot!
This has been a bummer of a recovery and I wish it had never happened but, in the great scheme of things, everything worked out positively for me.
I hated all the pink ribbon crap BEFORE I got cancer and I hate it even more now. I will not wrap myself in pink or define myself by this event. I’m not even comfortable calling myself a “survivor”… I had a surgery – like have an appendix out – and I’m done. Survivors are those people who have to sit through a year of chemo or radiation and their illness is so long and so painful.
Thanks for sharing your story and your frustration. Know that I share it. 🙂
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Thank you being a bold and courageous woman! Your blog was right on! I totally agree with what you have to say. Thank you for posting the information about the three organizations that are your favorite. Good to know.
Breast cancer has been a very real thing for many women in my family. All of them had different outcomes.
We all use essential oils to stay well (Oregano to kick colds and flues, lavender, lemon and peppermint for allergies, etc.). This week I learned about an oil blend called DDR Prime. Every cancer cell that has been exposed to this oil so far, has been eaten! And killed! I know a little girl in our community who is battling cancer (age 10) and I bought this oil for her in the hopes that it will help her win her fight against cancer. I pay wholesale for the oils, and am happy to get that discount for anyone interested in trying it. (I would not be making a profit, I want to be clear that I am not selling this for profit, I merely want to see people healed and I believe that this is a wonderful place to start.)
I only know for sure that it works on stomach, lung and breast cancers. But that is a start! 🙂
May your mind and body be healthy and peace filled as you continue your life journey. 🙂 Please let me know if I can offer you anymore information.
My email address is jennheinze@yahoo.com feel free to contact me anytime. Blessings!
(This is just in case you are curious, if you want the DDR Prime do not order from my website, you will have to pay retail if you do. I would love to get this oil to you wholesale, if you want it. http://www.mydoterra.com/purelyessentialsnw/)
(doTERRA’s DDR Prime™ Essential Oil Cellular Complex is a proprietary blend of CPTG (Certified Pure Therapeutic Grade®) essential oils combined to support healthy cell biogenesis, function, and renewal. DDR Prime includes the pure aromatic compounds of frankincense, wild orange, lemongrass, thyme, summer savory, clove, and niaouli that have been shown in clinical studies to support cellular health and vitality.
Cells have a limited lifespan for performing their many unique and specialized functions in an organism. A normal and natural mechanism for maintaining optimal cell function is a process of cellular renewal called apoptosis in which older cells are eliminated through a process of self-regulated destruction, and new cells are made to replace old cells. Through this process, humans replace the approximate equivalent of their body weight in new cells every year! If cellular apoptosis and regeneration are compromised, sub-optimal health conditions may follow. Staying young and enjoying a long life of vitality begins with healthy cellular function.*
*Taken from doTERRA’s back office – product information sheet on DDR Prime)
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PREACH SISTER!!!! You’ve articulated BEAUTIFULLY the problems with pinkwashing. I’m a stage 4, chemo-going, lymphedema managing, four daughters-running, psychopath-divorcing, snarky woman who gets FIRED UP about the sexualization and exploitation and sheer capitalistic megamachine that breast cancer “awareness” has become. I am mental that this has gone viral. And, more personally, I wish you enough energy today to do your damn lymphatic massage, wash the stupid sleeve and glove, and take the mountains of pills we hope will keep us around to see our kids grow up.
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Think before you Pink! You are very courageous and inspiring! Thank you for sharing your journey!
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Thank you! I hope many people read your article and become aware of what all this “pinkness,” and bralessness really does (and does not do.)
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I am a “previvor”. I lost my Mom to Breast Cancer in 1987. I have never been a “pink product” purchaser, knowing full well, it is exactly what you stated in your blog. I have donated to specific individuals (family members) . I had a double mastectomy 2 years ago in November, I also endured infection, and weeks of antibiotics IV. After that, I decided no reconstruction. My goal was to give myself a chance at healthy. I have much the same attitude about coping as you, and I think the braless day is indeed distasteful. I am grateful that I have given myself a chance at living longer than my Mom. She was 54 years young when I had to say goodbye. I have also lost 3 Aunts, and have 2 first cousin diagnosed and endured mastectomies. I am BRCA 2 positive, as is my Daughter. I have shared the link to your blog on my FB page. I hope it will be read by many. Best wishes to you.
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While breast cancer isn’t prevalent in my family I lost a grandfather (60) to lung, a sister (21) to lymphoma, my mother in law (59) to stomach cancers. I honestly believe that a good amount of people who don all the pink paraphernalia don’t realize that most of that money doesn’t even get to research/education maybe a few cents if that. If you want to support any sort of cancer research, there’s always the American Cancer Society or the 3 organizations mentioned. I love the suggestion of just be there for the person who is going through the reality of dealing with cancer. I hope one day to be able to say that I haven’t lost anyone else to this dreaded disease but until then I’ll let my actions not my wardrobe speak of my support
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Hello! Breast cancer is everywhere in my family and although I’m fortunate enough to be from the only cancer free branch, that doesn’t mean we’ll stay that way forever. These ‘save the tata’s’ and ‘no bra day’ things have pissed me off for a long time. Why should I do something to bring ‘awareness’ to issue of breast cancer that my 5 cancer survivor aunts cannot do?
I say, if we truly need to do something visual with our breasts to bring attention to cancer, how about if next year, let’s those of us who can, bind our chests and make the girls look gone. Who is honestly going to see a braless woman and think to themselves ‘I think cancer is bad.’ We are more than our breasts, so for one day how about if we take the breasts away so people realize how important they are? People who know us will ask where they went and we can use that as a way to bring it up. It would also allow me to feel, just for a day, a small part of what my aunts have to go through every day of their lives.
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THANK YOU. I’m a survivor, only stage 0 DCIS but I did lose my right breast to a mastectomy, and I have started wincing every October as a result.
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Respect for you! To share your story is so important for us all, for “them” too, those who are unconscious of the dammage caused by cancer in general and breast cancer in particular. We must contribute to the global awareness and prevent the stupid campaigns meant ta raise money for their authors only or to provide “good consciousness” to those who share the information and immediately forget about it. And… courage to you… How are you now? By the way, I am just recovering from breast cancer (1st stade) and in radiotherapy still now… Best wishes to you and to us all 🙂
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I couldn’t agree with you more! I saw the National NO BRA Campaign and thought how ridiculous it was! Set your ta ta’s free….come on! As a survivor who lost a breast and went through 6 months of chemo, I find this campaign insulting! Thank you for your wonderful blog!!! (Almost 8 years cancer free!)
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Thank you so much for sharing your experience. My Dad is a cancer survivor; cancer really is color blind.
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I am so tired of the patronizing tone of so many pinktober spiels. Sorry….tough month for me. My mom’s birthday is today and she died 16 days after it from metastatic breast cancer (15 years ago). So this month is a constant reminder of the suffering she went through. Thank you for keeping it real. I do not donate any money to blanket causes. I need to know specifically what the funds are going to…..and really….alot of those pink ribbon foods I would never consider buying in the first place.
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Amen. My sister was diagnosed at 38 and died at 41. I hate October cause it just causes bad memories to resurface. Plus, barely ANYTHING “PINK” goes to the the people who TRULY deserve the $…the actual people who are fighting it and can’t afford alternative treatments, BRCA tests, and clinical trials (my sister got NOTHING from ANY breast cancer org she applied for aid to) etc. I am TRILLED that you WON the fight!!
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